Welcome to #TransTuesday! This week we’re discussing a big problem that’s cropped up in our society that you might not have noticed, but it’s high time you did. We’re talking THE ERASURE OF TRANS MEN.
So, hey, obviously trans men exist, and this is a thing you’re aware of. But in so much of the discourse around transness, both good and bad, trans men are left out of the conversation. So let’s discuss the ways they’re left out and why that is.
The most recent and likely biggest way they’ve been left out is in the discussions over abortion rights and Roe falling. Everyone who actually cares about rights and bodily autonomy was outraged, but… almost universally it was about WOMEN.
WOMEN WOMEN WOMEN. Now listen, I am a woman! I love women. We’re just super in every way. BUT NOT ALL WOMEN CAN GET PREGNANT (be they cis or trans), but also SOME TRANS MEN CAN GET PREGNANT AND THIS AFFECTS THEM TOO.
I wrote about this right after Roe fell, in the Trans Tuesday on TRANS RAGE, aka Stop Forgetting About Us.
A reminder that the fight for abortion rights AND the fight for trans rights (and disability rights) are the exact same fight. It all boils down to bodily autonomy, and how everyone deserves it and the EXACT same group of people, led by cishet white men, don’t want us to have it.
There’s a trans tuesday all about BODILY AUTONOMY, and how I never felt like I had it before transitioning, and how that’s all tied in with my tattoo.
Trans men are at the intersection of the fight for abortion rights and trans rights, and if you need a reminder of what TRANS INTERSECTIONALITY is all about (and you absolutely DO if you’re leaving trans men out of the fight for abortion rights), here’s the Trans Tuesday on that.
But trans men are often left out of so, so much more than that. Look at trans rep in the media, such as it is. Paltry in the best of terms, and still often harmful. It’s anecdotal, but see the Trans Tuesday on TRANS REP IN MEDIA 2022 for a snapshot of what it’s like.
And you’ll even see right in that, there was a horribly transphobic joke in one show that was one hundred percent based on ignoring the very idea of trans men. They’re forgotten or discarded, often in service of hurting other trans people.
They’re often also completely ignored in a lot of the legislative transphobia making its way through courthouses all across the country. And I don’t mean that those horrid laws don’t affect them, because they ABSOLUTELY do. As much as any trans person.
But their existence is completely forgotten about in the arguments in favor of those bigoted laws… BECAUSE THEY DISPROVE AND DISMANTLE TRANSPHOBIC ARGUMENTS.
These laws are almost wholly focused on trans women and girls, and we’ll get to why in a minute. But let’s look at two of the biggest bigoted issues used to justify legislating and legalizing bigotry against us: trans people in sports, and bathroom bills.
As a basis, you need to know how the entire TRANS SPORTS hullaballoo is COMPLETE AND UTTER NONSENSE on every scientific level. Here’s the Trans Tuesday on it, which will show you how there’s not a lick of science or fact behind it.
But their entire, faulty, bigoted argument is that trans women competing against cis women have an unfair advantage because we may (I stress, MAY) have higher levels of testosterone. I’m not going to re-debunk that here, so DO check out that Trans Tuesday I just linked you to.
But if that WERE the case (it’s not, but even if it were), why do you never hear a PEEP from them about trans men competing against cis men? Especially when many trans men ARE TAKING TESTOSTERONE AS PART OF HRT?
I shouldn’t have to say this, but I will clarify again so nobody misconstrues: I do not want trans men to be discriminated against or for these laws to focus more on them, goodness no.
But if the bigots’ argument is that it’s the TESTOSTERONE that gives trans women an unfair advantage, why don’t they ever complain about the people who are actually adding it to their bodies?
Because trans men HAVE been competing against cis men (just like trans women HAVE been competing against cis women) for decades and guessssss what? THEY DO NOT HAVE ANY UNFAIR ADVANTAGE WHATSOEVER.
And if people who are willfully injecting testosterone to make their bodies align with their gender don’t have an unfair advantage, how the entire hell could people who are SUPPRESSING their testosterone have an unfair advantage? Ignoring trans men here is willful ignorance.
In terms of the bathroom bills, all you ever hear about is the “danger” of we trans women being in women’s bathrooms, because society continues to paint us as nothing more than sexual predators who are “men in dresses” and that we only do it to assault women.
Never mind that cis men assault women all the time, right in public, and don’t need to be dressed as women to do it. Never mind that no cis man who wanted to sexually assault women would go through everything we trans women go through just to perpetrate an assault.
Never mind that most sexual assaults happen with someone the victim already knows. Never mind that even the most cursory search of news stories will show you it’s something that NEVER happens, yet trans women are ROUTINELY the victims of sexual assault ourselves.
Have you ever heard ANY of those bigots talk about trans men in men’s bathrooms? Nope. Why? Why would they just ignore that? Why the hell do you think?
Because what their bigoted laws are suggesting is that if you send trans women into men’s bathrooms (where we’re very likely to be assaulted), then you must also send TRANS MEN into women’s bathrooms.
This is who bigots think should be using women’s bathrooms.
Aydian Dowling, the first trans man on the cover of Men’s Health magazine
Laith Ashley, model and actor
Brian Michael Smith, actor
Elliot Fletcher, actor
Do you see? Do you understand? The only reason bigots ignore trans men is because their very existence disproves the ENTIRE line of attack against trans people that is almost exclusively targeted at trans women.
And why is that? Well if you haven’t figured it out already, it’s misogyny. Specifically transmisogyny, but also it’s just the hatred of women in general. Because trans men rejected womanhood to be their true selves, and society is perfectly okay with that.
Well, in general. There’s still definitely a portion of transphobes who think trans men are “confused lesbians” which is complete and utter nonsense but also ignores all the gay trans men and look, how can you not see how transparent this all is?
But misogyny permeates every corner of our society. It’s why “tomboys” are accepted and even celebrated, but a man who’s even slightly effeminate is ridiculed and mocked and often attacked. Masculinity is celebrated, femininity is ridiculed.
And we trans woman, who society “gifted” with manhood, REJECTED IT. We said NAH and threw it away. And in the false cis binary matrix of society, there is no greater threat to rich, able-bodied, cishet white men’s power than rejecting masculinity.
And that trans men want masculinity, but not THAT masculinity, and DON’T wield it like a weapon of oppression as society dictates, and have by and large completely rejected toxic masculinity… also disproves absolutely EVERYTHING society wants you to believe about men.
Trans men aren’t out there assaulting women, CIS men are. And it’s not the victim blaming refrain of how women dress (UGH) because guess what, trans men see the same women. They don’t have impulse control problems. They don’t use their masculinity to hurt others.
Trans men are a shining beacon that disprove absolutely everything the false binary of society wants you to believe. So the only way bigots can perpetrate their hate is by ignoring their existence altogether. But those of us who aren’t bigots MUST do better.
We NEED to be allies to trans men. They’re an important and vital part of this fight, they show us everything beautiful a man can be, and they are our brothers who deserve respect.
And it’s high time we started showing it.
Tilly Bridges, end transmission.
tillysbridges@gmail.com